Imagine, if you will, a place where the line between a haunted Victorian séance and a top-notch chip butty is dangerously, delightfully thin. That place, my friends, is South Shields, and its name is The Black Candle. It’s the kind of restaurant that makes you wonder if the ghost of a Victorian fisherman is currently critiquing your choice of side salad.
The menu at The Black Candle isn't just a list of food; it’s a grimoire of comfort eating. You half expect the starters to be written in squid ink on a scroll tied with a raven’s feather. Let me tell you, the reality is even better.
First up: the teasers. This isn’t your standard prawn cocktail. We’re talking about Melting Middle Mac & Cheese Bites that are so gooey they should be illegal in at least three countries. I’m pretty sure one of them whispered “feed me” as I popped it in my mouth.
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Then there’s the ‘Bone Marrow & Beef Dripping’ starter. It arrives looking like something you’d find in a medieval witch’s larder, but it tastes like angels slow-cooked a cow in butter. You scoop the marrow out with a little toast and suddenly forget all your worldly problems.
But let's get to the main event: the ‘Black Candle Burger’. This isn't just a burger; it’s a monument. It’s a beef patty, bacon, cheese, and a dark charcoal bun that looks like it was baked in the ashes of a Victorian fireplace. I’m convinced the charcoal is there to absorb your mid-life crisis.
If you’re not in the mood for beef, you can try the Vampire’s Revenge: a halloumi and roasted veg stack that is so tall, it threatens the structural integrity of your jaw. The halloumi squeaks with joy as you bite into it, like a tiny rubber duck that has achieved sentience.
Here’s a surprising fact: The Black Candle is actually a family-run joint that used to be a traditional fish and chip shop. They just decided one day to go full gothic. It’s like your nan decided to start listening to heavy metal and dye her hair purple—and she makes the best Yorkshire puddings in town.
The mains are split into “From the Sea” and “From the Land” sections, which is very Game of Thrones energy. The Fish & Chips come wrapped in newspaper that’s been artfully stained to look like an ancient pirate map. The mushy peas, I swear, have a slightly erotic green glow.
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For landlubbers, the ‘Hellfire Ribs’ are slathered in a sauce that is described as “volcanically sweet.” This is not an exaggeration. You will sweat, you will cry, and you will order a third portion. My friend once licked the plate, and the waiter gave him a slow, respectful nod.
Don't even get me started on the steak. It comes with a black peppercorn sauce that is so rich, it should have its own credit card. They serve it with a little sign that says, “Eat responsibly, or don’t.” I chose “don’t” and had the whole thing in under nine minutes.
The sides are not an afterthought—they are supporting actors who steal the show. The Truffle & Parmesan Fries are so addictive, I’m pretty sure the government should regulate them. The Honey Roasted Carrots are glazed like a vintage car and taste like a vegetable’s autobiography of success.
And then, the desserts. The menu warns: “Enter at your own risk.” The Sticky Toffee Pudding is served in a cast-iron cauldron, bubbling with toffee sauce that looks like black lava. It is served with a single vanilla pod, which I assume is meant to be a wand you wave to cast a spell of pure happiness.
There is also a ‘Dark Chocolate & Sea Salt Brownie’ that is so dense, it could be used as a paperweight in a hurricane. It’s served with a scoop of clotted cream that looks like a cloud that got kicked out of heaven for being too decadent.
The Black Candle
Now, the drinks. They have a cocktail called ‘The Séance’ which is black, smoky, and served in a glass with a skull etched on it. It tastes like a gin and tonic that went to magic school. One sip, and you’ll start telling people your deepest secrets.
They also do a ‘Witches’ Brew’, which is a non-alcoholic punch that changes color from purple to pink when you stir it. Don’t ask how. Just accept the sorcery. The staff wear black T-shirts that say “Eat, Drink, and Be Scary,” which is the greatest corporate motto in history.
A final surprising fact: The owners once dressed up as Victorian undertakers for a Halloween event and never stopped. The staff now genuinely walk with a slight, theatrical shuffle. I asked for more ketchup, and one of them handed it to me with a slow, mournful bow, whispering, “It is done.”
To summarize: The Black Candle in South Shields is not a restaurant. It’s a culinary haunted house where the food is deliciously terrifying. Go for the mac and cheese bites, stay for the existential crisis served with a side of brilliant chips. Just don't be surprised if your dinner plate looks like it’s plotting a minor inconvenience.
Bring your appetite, a sense of humor, and maybe a crucifix—for the food, not the ghosts. The ghosts are actually very polite. They just want you to enjoy the Bone Marrow.